Children are not property. They deserve a safe and stable life. They should not be put on layaway indefinitely. The Children and the Grandparents and Special Others who provide kinship care for the children should not be kept in limbo forever. Absent, irresponsible and unreliable parents must be held accountable for their inaction.
The Adoption and Safe Families Act signed into law by President Clinton sets firm time limits on how long a child may stay in foster care before being freed for adoption. It states that if a child has been in foster care for 15 out of the most recent 22 months the state must file a petition to terminate the parents rights, find and approve adoptive homes for these children. This law excludes children that are being cared for by relatives and are not in the foster care system. The reason for this exclusion is that sometimes the relatives caring for the children are not in a position to adopt and would lose custody of the child forever if it were to apply to them. This is a good law and it has helped many children have safe and permanent homes. There ought to be another law! 5.5 million children are being raised in grandparent headed families. One third of those children live in homes with no parent present. These children fall through the cracks and live in limbo without the security that comes with having a permanent home.
Forever is a promise that kinship care givers are afraid to give to the children in their care. They know that no matter how many years a parent has been absent and unreliable, that parent can come back, prove only minimal competence to reclaim their children from what in most cases is the only stable home they ever knew. New laws covering the rights of children whom neither live with their parents nor are under the umbrella of the foster care system is needed. We need a law that will protect the rights of children being well cared for by relatives who are not able to adopt them while enabling the grandparents and other relatives to adopt if they choose and are qualified to adopt. Children being cared for by relatives should be accorded the same rights as foster children.
If a grandparent or other relative wishes to and is qualified to adopt, the same time limits should apply. If the parents fail to rehabilitate themselves within a reasonable amount of time the rights of those parents must be terminated and allow a qualified grandparent or other relative who have been caring for the children in their absence to adopt those children. Only then can children, grandparents and the special others who are caring for the children depend on the promise of FOREVER.
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